Sage That Sh*t

Sick of Bad Energy? Light This Fucking Candle and Watch It Run

Let’s be honest: life’s full of bullshit—bad vibes, shitty omens, and energy so toxic it makes a landfill smell fresh. That’s where this badass candle comes in. Made with real sage splits, this isn’t just a candle; it’s a fucking exorcist in a jar. Light it up, and tell every ounce of bad energy to pack its shit and get the hell out of your space.

Whether it’s your shitty ex’s lingering presence, a streak of bad luck that just won’t quit, or the energy-sucking asshole who stood way too close in line at the grocery store, this candle is your spiritual middle finger. Sage, rosemary, sandalwood, and cedarwood team up to cleanse your space so thoroughly, even the bad vibes will think twice about coming back.

And here’s the kicker: It’s made in America. That’s right—every jar is poured right here in the USA. Not only are you clearing your space, but you’re also supporting local like a fucking boss. Patriotism never smelled so good.

Why this candle is the only thing standing between you and chaos:

• Infused with real sage splits for maximum “fuck you” energy-clearing power
• Made with renewable, vegan coconut and apricot wax—because saving the planet is the least we can fucking do
• Fragrance oils so clean, even the spirits will want to stay for a whiff
• Organic cotton wicks for a clean burn, because soot is just bad vibes in disguise
• Paraben-free, phthalate-free, and cruelty-free—because harming animals is some evil shit

Scent Notes:
Sage, Rosemary, Sandalwood, Cedarwood—basically the olfactory equivalent of kicking bad energy’s ass.

Product Details:

• Size: 9oz glass jar with a reusable lid (perfect for stashing sage splits or other witchy shit)
• Proudly made in America—because good energy starts at home
• Perfect for cleansing bad vibes, flipping the bird to negative omens, and giving your space the spiritual power-up it deserves

Light this fucking candle, watch the bad energy evaporate, and let your space fill with calm, clarity, and the unmistakable smell of “I’ve got my shit together.” This isn’t just a candle—it’s a fucking vibe shift in a jar.